The Last Word

[Rollo]

'lo. When come back, bring pie.

[MrJan]

Me like pie.

[schmenke]

Pie good.

[MrJan]

Let's go to Piekea

[schmenke]

Swedish pies?

[MrJan]

Flat packed pies.

[Rollo]

They'd be found in Aisle 17, Location 2 and have the PLU of 760.800.924.06 and when you do finally get there are actually nearly two stories up, and you need one of the service dudes to get that forklift thing but none of them have the ticket.

Then the bloody thing doesn't fit on that trolley thing, and the trolley doesn't go down the ramps because the stupid mall owners have those bollard things and the whole thing just SHOOPS DA WOOP!

[Rollo]

...

[Rollo]

Hello?

[Rollo]

HELP!!!

I'm stuck in an Ikea regression loop! :eek:

[MrJan]

Never been Ikea

[NoahsGirl]

IKEA is the work of the devil

[MrJan]

No, the people that insist on going to Ikea are the work of the devil :p :

[NoahsGirl]

If there was no IKEA in the first place, then surely people would go elsewhere

[MrJan]

But if there were no people going to Ikea then it wouldn't be evil.

[Rollo]

Oh yes it would. There aren't any windows or any clocks in Ikea, so you have no idea of what the time is or whether the sun is shining. Consequently you walk around the store without a clue of what time it is; past every single frikkin display in the place, and they all have stupid names like Trom and Elorg so you can never find what you want anyway!

I can't stand the place and I'm sure my wife keeps on dragging me along there just so I can pay for what I did in a previous life... I must have done nasty things to puppies and children.

[djarumdudley]

Amen!

[Rollo]

Is there such a thing as Ikea rage?

[MrJan]

Oh yes it would. There aren't any windows or any clocks in Ikea, so you have no idea of what the time is or whether the sun is shining.

There's a magical invention called a watch. It's like a clock but small enough to carry on your wrist.

[schmenke]

Besides, I've seen clocks sold in Ikea :mark:

[djarumdudley]

wouldn't those be 'ta tid pas'?

[Rollo]

It's a pity that there isn't a European Championships for flat-placked furnture. Aftonbladet ran the word Shame on every page it could when Sweden lost 2-0 against Russia.

[MrJan]

On the bright side of the Euros, France are out :D

[NoahsGirl]

On the low side, I have a minor hangover :(

[MrJan]

On the bright side, I don't :p : :D

[NoahsGirl]

"The Sympathy School" should give you a refund :p

[djarumdudley]

no refunds on CODs

[MrJan]

"The Sympathy School" should give you a refund :p

Being a bloke I tend not to do sympathy :)

[Rollo]

Being a bloke I tend not to do sympathy :)

*grunt grunt grunt grunt*

I bet you're quite willing to do empathy if you're watching telly and some poor chap cops one to the knackers though.

[MrJan]

*grunt grunt grunt grunt*

I bet you're quite willing to do empathy if you're watching telly and some poor chap cops one to the knackers though.

Sort of, but at the same time I'm always glad that it wasn't mine :D

[schmenke]

Mondays... bah! :mad:

[MrJan]

I didn't finish work until 7 :eek:

[Rollo]

Mondays... bah! :mad:

Tell me why you don't like Mondays.

[MrJan]

boooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

[Rollo]

Oh boo yourself.

[MrJan]

Agree to disagree?

[schmenke]

Enjoyed a nice amble amongst the meadows last night, although the mosquitos were as big as pigeons :s

[MrJan]

Hey Schmenke is it true that some Canadians quite often go cottaging?

[schmenke]

Yeah, but it helps if you own a cottage :p :

[Rollo]

Hey Schmenke is it true that some Canadians quite often go cottaging?

Does 1812 count?

And the White House burned, burned, burned,
And we’re the one’s that did it!
It burned, burned, burned,
While the president ran and cried.
It burned, burned, burned,
And things were very historical.
And the Americans ran and cried like a bunch of little babies
Waa waa waah!
In the War of 1812!

I salute your country Mr. Schmenke in the name of all that's decent and proper :D

[MrJan]

Yeah, but it helps if you own a cottage :p :

Yeah my brother's just been (in the Canadian sense). Trouble is that on this side of the pond 'cottaging' is something completely different featuring at least 2 men and a public toilet. He has received suitable hassle :D

[Rollo]

I imagine that the Cottage "Cheese" would be somewhere near Cheddar Gorge :D

New Dehli is the opening of a meat delicatessen in India, Seychelles is a game where the first person to say "shells" wins, and Bangkok is an unfortunate injury in Thailand.

[MrJan]

And LW is what I have.

[Rollo]

ALL of the Luftwaffe? :eek:

[MrJan]

Yup, there's only two of them now, Heinz and Dave. Good blokes really, like cheese, enjoy beer and football :up:

[Rollo]

That would explain a bit. Whenever Dave wanted Heinz he'd yell "Beanz, Beanz, Beanz!". It all makes sense now, because...
BEANZ MEANZ HEINZ :D

[MrJan]

I thought beanz meant fartz?

[Rollo]

http://newyorkguide.blogs.com/psfk/images/beanz-thumb.jpg

Youz thoughtz wrongz. Pleaz readz signz.

[MrJan]

Come to sunny Devon, where it rains six days in seven. And boy is it raining now.

[Rollo]

Redback, funnel web, blue-ringed octopus,
Taipan, tigersnake and a box jellyfish.
Stonefish and the poison thing that lives in a shell
That spikes you when you pick it up
Come to Australia - You might accidentally get killed.

[MrJan]

not raining now

[schmenke]

Come to Canada and you might (well, you will) get stung by a mosquito... :mark:

[MrJan]

My brother said that the other day he got absolutely eaten by the things.

Didn't get bitten when I went though. although I'm not sure that mosquitos like snow :mark:

[schmenke]

The mosquito is Canada's official national bird...

[MrJan]

I thought that was Celine Dion ;)

[schmenke]

No, she's the official frog...

[Rollo]

During when Titanic was still in cinemas, I heard it said at the time that it would have been good if Celine Dion had gone down with the ship...

... perhaps someone could Rule 34 this and have Celine Dion going down on the ship. :D

[MrJan]

mmmmmmmmmmmm

[djarumdudley]

ha!

[MrJan]

indeed

[NoahsGirl]

I think I shall have some quality time with the last word - you boys have cabin fever.

[MrJan]

Bleddy hell, it's NG :D

[Rollo]

Don't be mocking the Scots, they have a hard enough time as it is what with there being a Scot as PM and as Secretary to the Treasury and as Chancellor of the Exchequor... hang on! That's not a hard time at all is it?

[MrJan]

It is for us ;) :p :

[Rollo]

Never a frown with Gordon Brown

[djarumdudley]

i prefer honey brown with my golden brown.

[MrJan]

texture like sun?

[schmenke]

Honey brown ale?

[MrJan]

Waggledance???

[djarumdudley]

macarena?

[schmenke]

The LW does not enjoy dancing.

[djarumdudley]

that is an unfounded allegation.

[Rollo]

I don't feel like dancing, dancing yugubagoboahbooo (or whatever the hell that line of that song is).

[schmenke]

Scissor Sisters?

[MrJan]

My first LW since re-entering the country :D

[schmenke]

Where ya been?

[MrJan]

France. Went to the Le Mans Classic which was nothing short of awesome :burnout:

[Rollo]

Mornington Crescent!

[MrJan]

Piccadilly

[schmenke]

The LW tires of this nonsense.

[MrJan]

The LW is all about nonsense.

[Rollo]

When has this thread ever been about sense? I ask thee in all seriousness, WHEN HAS IT EVER MADE ANY SENSE AT ALL!!!

[djarumdudley]

if i remember correctly it was sometime during the heyday of aught-5.

[MrJan]

Bonjour mon petite bureau de change

[Rollo]

¥£$?

[MrJan]

Does that count as a LW?

[Rollo]

Why not? Is it tae 1337 for ye?

[MrJan]

Mate everything on the internet is too leet for me, I feel bad enough that I even know what that means.

[Rollo]

http://digitaldaily.allthingsd.com/files/2007/07/notatruck.jpg


"The Internet is not something that you just dump something on. It's not a big truck. It's a series of tubes."
- US Senator, Ted Stevens.

[MrJan]

I thought TV was tubes

[schmenke]

Bonjour mon petite bureau de change

Bonjour mon petit bureau d'échange.

[Rollo]

Hello little foreign exchange office. I have a ZM$1,000,000,000 note I'd like you to meet.

[MrJan]

Is that a chat up line?

[CarlMetro]

Just got time for a little yoinking......

[djarumdudley]

that was quite enough.

[MrJan]

The lesser spotted Carl :eek:

[Rollo]

...seen in its natural environment, quietly yoinking and generally being usurped by more vocal members of its tribe.

[schmenke]

Ban him I say! :eek:

[MrJan]

I concur.

[Rollo]

It's time for a public burning, with dragging carcasses through the streets and weping an gnashing of teeth. Gnash gnash gnash!

[MrJan]

Anne Nashine, wasn't she a tennis player?

[Rollo]

If she was, then nost likely she had a moving company on the side... Van Nashine :D

[MrJan]

Any relation to Drum Nashine?

[Rollo]

Their Spanish friend Manuel Gears lives next door.

An Arab me wore new NFL jerseys (http://www.jerseys-shopping.com) was interviewed at a U.S checkpoint.Guard: your name please?Arab: runescape money (http://www.g2gmart.com)G:Sex?A: 6 items a week.G: I mean,male or female?A: It doesn't matter,sometimes even camelG: holy cow!A: yes cows and dogs too!G: man,isn't that hostile?A: hostile,dogstyle any free style!G;oh dear!A Deer?No deer,they run fast....

[Rollo]

My local pub has the words Mna and Fir on the toilet doors. Since I don't know Gaelic, which ones should I use?


I mean,male or female?
It doesn't matter, sometimes even camel

Right then, next time I'm using the toilets marked... camel :D

[MrJan]

Use the ones which blokes are going into :D And Camels :mark:

[Rollo]

Why the hell are camels allowed in the pub in the first place? If they allow camels in, then what's next?


Yes cows and dogs too! man, isn't that hostile? Hostile, dogstyle any free style! Oh dear! A Deer? No deer, they run fast....

Apparantly not deer, they run fast.

[Rollo]

http://www.f1rejects.com/hall/lucky/dannerrial.jpg

[djarumdudley]

deer are fine as they provide an accurate representation of a drunkard when performing the in headlights homage.

[schmenke]

Oh deer... :erm:

[mnop901]

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[Rollo]

Dear Mnop,
I heard u liek mudkipz.

[djarumdudley]

i like last word

[Donney]

But the LW likes me best.

[schmenke]

The LW likes everyone.

[Donney]

Isn't it lovely?

[MrJan]

I like lamp

[Rollo]

I like lamp
http://www.beefclothing.com/images/lovelamp.jpg

I'll bet you do.

[MrJan]

Yup

[Donney]

Good to know, I guess...

[MrJan]

I'm good to know, people say that I'm special....or a special, one of the two :disturb:

[NoahsGirl]

I shall be spending quality time with the LW

[MrJan]

Quality time need not be for long :p :

[Rollo]

Yes, it's about quality not quantity.

[djarumdudley]

regardless of either, your time is up.

[Rollo]

Oh dear :eek: I never thought my time would end with something as puerile as a forum post. Still I suppose that it's better than most people...

I guessing that the sign in Harrod's was actually a very deep philosophical platitude rather than a banal message when it said Everything must go.

[MrJan]

Well that's another LWer down (following DD and Carl). Victory shall yet be mine.

[Rollo]

Down and dead. This must mean that I am posting from beyond the grave... woooooooooooo....

[MrJan]

aahhh

[Donney]

Ooops!

[MrJan]

What have you done? :rolleyes: :p :

[Donney]

Me? Nothing, can't prove anything!

[MrJan]

hmmmmm

[Rollo]

And in deference to Sir Terry Wogan's take on Taggart... "There's been a murder".

[MrJan]

mudder?

[Donney]

Scully?

[MrJan]

boobs

[Donney]

The LW likes them.

[MrJan]

Everyone likes them

[Rollo]

See this thread:
"What's the first thing to come to your mind?"

boobs

[djarumdudley]

being that rollo is obviously a zombie it is my duty to take the last word to secure refuge.

[MrJan]

Rollo - I see nothing wrong with that :cheese:

[52Paddy]

.

[MrJan]

No LW for Paddy, but he does have the Last Full Stop

[52Paddy]

I was in the bathroom. Hey give me that LW back, thief!

[MrJan]

Thief!!! I'll think you'll find that the LW is my property

[Rollo]

being that rollo is obviously a zombie it is my duty to take the last word to secure refuge.

And that secure refuge is... The Winchester Pub! What a capital idea :D

[MrJan]

Would anyone like a peanut?

[DonnieDarco]

And that secure refuge is... The Winchester Pub! What a capital idea :D

Thank god it's not in Winchester :D


Yes it is me, I felt like seeing if the usual suspects were bickering over the LW, and well, they are :D

[52Paddy]

Great film that is. :up:

[MrJan]

Usual Suspects or Shaun of the Dead?

[Donney]

Usual Suspects.

[MrJan]

Keyzer Soze!!!!!

[schmenke]

Wha...?

[MrJan]

t??

[schmenke]

hanks for ha. ha key doesn' work on my keyboard.

[52Paddy]

schmenke, don't post with your mouth full.

[schmenke]

Buuuuuuuurp!

[djarumdudley]

now time for an actual last word, mine.

[MrJan]

gulp!!!!!!!!!!

[52Paddy]

*hides under table*

[MrJan]

Come out of there you yellow bellied man odourous pervert :p : (blame Monty Python for the last bit :D )

[djarumdudley]

Spam!

[Donney]

I'm not sure the LW likes spam sandwiches...

[52Paddy]

Did someone say spam? God, I'm hungry. :lips:

[MrJan]

My Ma makes a lovely spam and onion pie :facelick:

[Rollo]

Hasn't got as much spam in it as spam egg sausage and spam, has it?

[MrJan]

eh??

[schmenke]

Recently saw the musical production Spamalot. Brilliant! Anyone else seen it?

[Donney]

I can't say I have.

[MrJan]

not me

[djarumdudley]

i'm waiting for the sketch adaptation

[MrJan]

marning

[52Paddy]

:s keleton:

[DonnieDarco]

Valencia...............that was THE dullest two hours of my entire life, worst track EVER!!!!!!!

My first whiney complaint, it won't be my last :D

[MrJan]

Lame GP, glad I kept turning over.

[Rollo]

I thought that the GP was less rubbish than the people jumping out of the foldy red bus in the Olympic ceremony. Ooh look a London Bus, yay... but Becks is in there, oh e.

[52Paddy]

And yet I heard the GP2 was very entertaining. I have the sprint races recorded so I'll have a look later.

[Donney]

They were better than F1, which is not much to say.

[52Paddy]

Yeah, true enough. But at least the field is bigger.

[djarumdudley]

yoinked

[MrJan]

done

[Donney]

gone

[MrJan]

bone

[schmenke]

dog

[MrJan]

cat

[schmenke]

Aren't we in the wrong thread?

[MrJan]

The LW thread has only one rule...............it's mine :D :D

[Rollo]

That's not a "rule", that is an misinformed theory as created by Half-Baked Ideas & Ill-Conceived Concepts plc, makers of "Footo" the wonder boot-exploder and owners of the Horse Drawn Zeppelin Service.

[djarumdudley]

indeed, as your long winded explanation clarifies that it's mine.

[djarumdudley]

indeed, as your long winded explanation clearly indicates that the lw is mine

[Donney]

Nah, it isn't!

[MrJan]

I agree

[schmenke]

The LW disagrees.

[MrJan]

Disagrees with you maybe

[schmenke]

The LW is always very agreeable with me.

[MrJan]

I disagree

[djarumdudley]

you would!

[MrJan]

Who would I???

Busy day for the LW.

[djarumdudley]

it's not over yet.

[Rollo]

It could be very soon, and all it would take is a mod or he who must not be named to shut the whole thing down.

Of course, we'd just restart it again naturally. :D

[52Paddy]

I heard the LW has actually had to get counselling for the recent stress its been put under. The lot of you are bullies! Its still only 6196 posts old, only beginning to hit adolescence.

[Donney]

It's a difficult time, but being a teenager is not an excuse. And the LW is mine.

[MrJan]

I'm not a bully, I just love too much ;) :p :

[Donney]

No wonder it is so stressed, with your attentions..... :mad: :eek:

[MrJan]

It loves me too

[schmenke]

The LW likes to spread its love :kiss:


:erm:

[MrJan]

No it doesn't, the LW isn't some cheap floozy (sp??), it only loves me.

[NoahsGirl]

it's certainly not a gigalo, it only loves me

[MrJan]

Bleddy hell NG, do you want to leave some of the Word Games threads untouched? :p :

[schmenke]

Like the LW, NG gets around




:erm:

[MrJan]

haw haw haw :laugh:

[NoahsGirl]

*sigh* my reputation goes before me ;-)

[MrJan]

There's nothing I can say to that

[djarumdudley]

ditto

[Donney]

I'll consult the LW then.

[MrJan]

The LW says you smell :dog:

[Donney]

You as in the plural meaning all but me, you mean?

[MrJan]

Yes. Everyone, except me, smells :D

[Donney]

All right who is me?



Oh wait a minute I know... me! :)

[MrJan]

No Donney, you smell, I don't :D

[Donney]

That's an outrageous accusation!!! I demand satisfaction!!!!!

http://www.freesmileys.org/smileys/sport012.gif (http://www.freesmileys.org)

[MrJan]

It's not your fault, it's just a fact of life that everyone except me smells.........of poo :p :

[Rollo]

Ms Darco doesn't... she smells like cat wee :D

[MrJan]

and poo :p :

[Rollo]

Join along if you know the poo and wee song

[MrJan]

Donnie does :D

[djarumdudley]

isn't that her entrance music?

[Donney]

Pure class I tell you :p

[MrJan]

Squabble

[Brown, Jon Brow]

I forgot about the last word thread, its been over a year since i last posted in this thread.

[MrJan]

It's been over 5 hours since I did :D

[schmenke]

The LW missed B,JB... well, not really (he smells).

[Brown, Jon Brow]

The LW missed B,JB... well, not really (he smells).

The smell of cabbage is completely normal

[MrJan]

7yypy7p

[Rollo]

7yypy7p

Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysilio gogogoch... and?

[djarumdudley]

pythagorean theorem

[MrJan]

On a right angled triangle the square of the hypoteneuse is equal to the sum of the square of the other two sides.

[Donney]

And there you go, the LW hates maths.

[MrJan]

So do I

[schmenke]

I hate math, so you can imagine how I feel about maths.

[MrJan]

It's not called Mathematic, it's called Mathematics, you could at least have the decency to speak our language.....or French :p : :D

[djarumdudley]

i support the indececies levied upon the maths

[MrJan]

Isn't it indices??? :confused:

[djarumdudley]

perhaps

[MrJan]

Perhapsnot

[schmenke]

Snot?

[djarumdudley]

it's not your last word anymore

[DonnieDarco]

I thought that the GP was less rubbish than the people jumping out of the foldy red bus in the Olympic ceremony. Ooh look a London Bus, yay... but Becks is in there, oh e.

That was incredibly embarrassing, wasn't it? Leona Lewis, superstar??? I think not. Then we had some old git playing guitar, when he should have been collecting his pension. The whole thing made my toes curl, and I am looking forward to 2012 a lot less now.

But you are wrong that the GP was less rubbish than that, it was equally rubbish :D

I realise this reply is delayed due to my extreme lack of time, and I would also like to point out that I do not smell of wee or poo, and I don't know of the wee and poo song :P