The Last Word

[Donney]

Never ask a lady her age!


:disturb:

Must..... resist... unappropiate comments.....


DD I won't ask but admit the LW is mine! :p

[djarumdudley]

wouldn't she have to admit it was yours?

[schmenke]

It doesn't really matter as the LW is rightfully mine.

[Captain VXR]

But I usurped you :p

[CarlMetro]

Mine!

[stevie_gerrard]

if u say so :p :

[DonnieDarco]

:disturb:

Must..... resist... unappropiate comments.....


DD I won't ask but admit the LW is mine! :p

I admit nothing!!!!!! :D

[CarlMetro]

I deny everything :D

[DonnieDarco]

Me too!! :D

[Rollo]

Deny everything; admit nothing? Sounds like someone's running for the job at Number 10.
I'd like to live at Number 10, but only for that front door. In fact, when I build my own house, I'm going to put a Number 10 replica doorway in... even if it's not at number 10 - that'll confuse the posties.

[Donney]

The LW likes your idea.

[DonnieDarco]

Yeah, its a goodun' :D

[CarlMetro]

I'm not sure I'd want a policeman standing ouitside it all the time though :dozey:

[Donney]

I wouldn't but the door looks good.

[schmenke]

The LW wants sees a red door and wants it painted black.

[CarlMetro]

Is that before or after it's 19th nervous breakdown?

[Donney]

The LW has good taste in music.

[LeonBrooke]

Must..... resist... unappropiate comments.....

Why do that? The LW loves making inappropriate comments :D

[Captain VXR]

The lw says "Rollo please make a question on the forum pub quiz thread" What it said http://www.driftworks.com/forum/images/smilies/yes.gif

[LeonBrooke]

Ah... the LW likes making trouble, it does :D

[CarlMetro]

No, it prefers making sand castles or cookies, especially choco ones :lips:

[MrJan]

The LW is going to spend tomorrow biting it's finger nails and watching the mighty Exeter City against Southport, praying for a win to take us into the play offs :D :D

[Captain VXR]

Erm no, the last word hates football and will be having KFC with me at lunch tommorow

[MrJan]

I'm sorry but you must be talking about a fake last word. The real LW loves football and Exeter City and if you cut it then the blood is red a white and emits a faint chant; "Flacky, Flacky, Flacky"

Incindentally the LW will also be mourning the loss of Alan Ball who (not a lot of people know this) won the world cup with England, of course most people prefer to remember his time as manager of the Grecians.

[Rollo]

Does it have a Croydon Facelife, plastic bling and is a chav as well?

[DonnieDarco]

You guys talk funny :D

[djarumdudley]

i'll be having the last word now.

[Captain VXR]

Time over, the captainator is back :p

[CarlMetro]

The what?

:rotflmao: :laugh: :rotflmao:

[Donney]

The LW is back with me.

[DonnieDarco]

No its not! :D

[CarlMetro]

Because it's with me :D

[LeonBrooke]

By "me", Carl, I assume you mean me :D

[Captain VXR]

Yes me, the one and only Captain VXR. The last word says that Leon is a donkey in disguise

[Donney]

That's quite a revelation.

[Captain VXR]

I know, the last word says that you're a baboon :p

[djarumdudley]

how can the last word say anything, when it's the last of it's kind?

[stevie_gerrard]

what, just like dr who? :p :

[CarlMetro]

By "me", Carl, I assume you mean me :D

You been taking 'how to be wrong all the time' lessons from DD ? :p :

[Rollo]

I tried to enroll in those... the £18,000 fee I thought was a bit steep though.

[LeonBrooke]

You been taking 'how to be wrong all the time' lessons from DD ? :p :

Yes. She's a great teacher; the £18,000 is well worth it :) I recommend her course to anyone.

[Donney]

I know, the last word says that you're a baboon :p

:(

That proves you've never had the real LW.

[schmenke]

The real LW is, and always has been, with me.

[Captain VXR]

Sorry schmenke, that's the lw's long lost cousin you've got there

[Donney]

The LW has a big family.

[djarumdudley]

because the real thing is here.

[schmenke]

Family members will do nicely in the absence of the LW himself :D

[Donney]

It's good to know you like the LW relatives. :D

[DonnieDarco]

Who? :D

[CarlMetro]

Time for a bit of good old fashioned yoinking methinks :D

[Donney]

Some habits are hard to give up.

[djarumdudley]

like needing the last word.

[CarlMetro]

Especially when they're so enjoyable :D

[Donney]

I don't think the LW enjoys it as much.

[stevie_gerrard]

really, do you think so?

[CarlMetro]

I think the LW likes a bit of yoinking, perhaps a little too much :\

[LeonBrooke]

The LW has a yoinking problem, it does. So, it'll be enjoying its stay at my house :D

[DonnieDarco]

There is waaaay too much of that around these here parts, its not right :D

[LeonBrooke]

I agree with you... but, what the LW wants, it gets...

[schmenke]

The LW wants to remain with me :D

[CarlMetro]

Why?

[Captain VXR]

But it is in my house as it prefers me to schmenke

[djarumdudley]

the last word has had enough of the indoors, going for walk to stretch it's legs.

[CarlMetro]

Seems to have wandered over here to me :D

[schmenke]

It's obviously lost :p :

[Captain VXR]

And is now found

[CarlMetro]

.............it's true home, with me again :D

[stevie_gerrard]

is it now? :p :

[Rollo]

It comes in at about the same time as the cows do.

[djarumdudley]

apparently they left it behind.

[LeonBrooke]

Poor LW, being left behind... it's very welcome to come here for some comfort...

[Donney]

Enough comforting it's helping me to stay awake now.

[schmenke]

Enjoy your snooze BB :p :

[Donney]

No snooze today is a long busy day, which should reward me with some tasty €, and I have so much to do in a very little time, therefore no time to sleep. The LW has offered its help and that's why it is here with me.

[schmenke]

The LW is working far too hard for a minimum of wages. It has gone on strike and refuses to work with you until a union agreement, wich includes porper wages, can be negotiated.

Until such time it has returned back to it's rightful owner for a bit of rest & relaxation...

[Captain VXR]

Who happens to be me...

[CarlMetro]

Porper wages :confused:

[djarumdudley]

proper last word thievery by me!

[CarlMetro]

But that's not allowed :s hock:

[stevie_gerrard]

go straight to jail, do not pass go, do not recieve the LW :p :

[LeonBrooke]

Good. Now that Carl's out of the way I can pass go and receive the LW :D

[Rollo]

Why is it that Peter Pan can fly in green tights but if I were to do that I'd get kicked off the airplane?

It's one rule for fictional story-book characters and another for the rest of us :angryfire :

[djarumdudley]

perhaps booking a flight with Robin Hood's Merry Men would be the suitable course of action.

[CarlMetro]

I've always wondered why Superman can turn up wearing his undies outside his trousers and nobody says a thing.

Then again I've seen stranger sights than that around London :\

[LeonBrooke]

Have you ever tried that? I think you should, it would be a very interesting social experiment.

[CarlMetro]

No, I'm far too sensible, perhaps it's the norm where you are?

[Donney]

Who knows?

[schmenke]

This thread is useless without pics!

:D

[Captain VXR]

The last word broke my camera... :bigcry:


























But it's getting me a better one :D

[CarlMetro]

Who needs pictures when you have imagination :D

[stevie_gerrard]

indeed people :p :

[Rollo]

Who needs pictures when you have imagination :D

My Imagination is in Dolby 16.3, Ultra HD, playback, fast forward, edit on the fly and has multiple languages... it's very very vivid indeed :D

[djarumdudley]

my imagination runs wild, but unfortuanately it only transmits in club to hollow wood definition.

[LeonBrooke]

No, I'm far too sensible, perhaps it's the norm where you are?

Have you no scientific curiosity man??

[CarlMetro]

No, but I have a pair of wellingtons and an umbrella :D

[Donney]

Congratulations? :confused:

[schmenke]

No, but I have a pair of wellingtons and an umbrella :D

This thread is useless without pics! :D

[CarlMetro]

There are some things which are better left to ones imagination ;)

[stevie_gerrard]

indeed :p :

[djarumdudley]

This thread is useless without pics! :D

pics are no substitute for the last word.

[Rollo]

Who needs pics? I need a Yorkie Bar and a pint of Tennant's right now.

[schmenke]

Although a Yorkie Bar and a pint sounds awfully tempting, I'll just take the LW for now.

[CarlMetro]

I think I'll have both the Yorkie and the LW :D

[djarumdudley]

just the last word for me.

[Captain VXR]

Nope

[stevie_gerrard]

Yup

[LeonBrooke]

Not quite; the LW for me.

[CarlMetro]

Me me me :D

[MrJan]

You you you

[Donney]

Not him, not him, not him. The LW is mine, mine, mine.

[DonnieDarco]

You're just greedy :D

[stevie_gerrard]

we're all greedy :p : otherwise we wouldnt all be hogging the LW like this :p :

[Rollo]

Not him, not him, not him. The LW is mine, mine, mine.


Spin, spin, spin
round, round, round he goes
and that's SENNA?! - Murray Walker
:D

[CarlMetro]

I'll have a pint of whatever he's on ;)

[Rollo]

Me personally?

I don't know if a pint of espresso coffee is espcially wise. If you're still awake in August, let me know how that went ;)

[CarlMetro]

Well I'm still awake now :dozey:

[LeonBrooke]

So how much Espresso have you had? Let us know when you sleep. There are some good opportunities for science coming out of this thread :D

[djarumdudley]

i'll have the last word while slumber sets in.

[LeonBrooke]

But what about the science? Where's your passion man?

[Donney]

Not by the LW.

[CarlMetro]

I like biology :cheese:

[schmenke]

The LW tires of all this intellectual talk...
It needs a break. It has chosen to have an indefinite respite with me :D

[NoahsGirl]

So why is it here in scotland with me schmenke? don't think the LW likes you anymore........

[stevie_gerrard]

good evening.

[Rollo]

And now...

No.3 - The Larch

[CarlMetro]

Nice to see Rollo watching Open University re-runs :D

[Rollo]

And now for something completely different...

No.3 The Larch

[LeonBrooke]

So why is it here in scotland with me schmenke? don't think the LW likes you anymore........

Maybe it's because of the better opportunities for science in Scotland...?

[CarlMetro]

I'm thinking of performing a few experiments........

[LeonBrooke]

Let me know when you're about to start; I'll tell the LW. Until then it wants to stay with me.

[CarlMetro]

I'm starting now :D

[Donney]

I'm pleased to report that the LW and I will go to Madrid to enjoy :dozey: a lecture about the Right to strike since the XVIII century, and then to have dinner at a posh restaurant.

Normal service will be resumed shortly.

[CarlMetro]

The posh dinner sounds alright but subjecting the LW to a lecture that sounds that boring is bordering on cruelty :s hock:

[Donney]

I know it is boring but we have no other option.

[CarlMetro]

You could always leave the LW with me, I'll take good care of it ;)

[DonnieDarco]

Yeah, riiight :D

[CarlMetro]

;(

I can't believe you question my ability to look after the LW

[schmenke]

The LW prefers to stay here with me.

[Rollo]

a lecture about the Right to strike since the XVIII century and then to have dinner at a posh restaurant.

I didn't know having dinner at a posh restaurant after striking was a Right. I shall have to go on strike now and demand my dinner :D

[LeonBrooke]

What kind of a regressive, capitalist country do you live in, Rollo :s hock:

[Rollo]

A regressive, capitalist country that should own the country that you live in :D New Zealand is in the Australian Constitution.

Let's do a swap, we'll take 'Brotown and you can have Rove McManaus?

[djarumdudley]

seeing how the last word was not involved in that transaction, i shall claim it as my own.

[LeonBrooke]

That sounds like a bargain for me. Hand over Rove and take what you want :D

[CarlMetro]

I'm all out of Rove at the moment, used the last one last night, but I'll take the LW and you'll have to trust me to give you some Rove when I get my next delivery :D

[Donney]

I didn't know having dinner at a posh restaurant after striking was a Right. I shall have to go on strike now and demand my dinner :D

:rotflmao:


The lecture was not that bad and the dinner was very good. The LW enjoyed both although it was a little overenthusiastic on the white wine.

[schmenke]

The LW is now with me, nursing a hangover...

[djarumdudley]

you got the last word drunk?!

[Donney]

No I didn't, it didn't need any help.

[MrJan]

WEMBERLY, WEMBERLY WE'RE THE FAMOUS EXETER CITY AND WE'RE GOING TO WEMBERLY. IN THE WORDS OF HER MAJESTY THE QUEEN; "F****** 'AV IT MY SON" :bounce: :bounce: :cheese: :D :burnout:

[LeonBrooke]

Are you sure the queen would use such language?

[MrJan]

She does frequently. Contrary to popular belief she is not an Arsenal fan but actually an avid Brentford supporter and can be heard yelling it from the stands most Saturdays. Also if you listening very carefully round the back of Buckingham Palace on a Sunday afternoon she is usually having a kickabout in the grounds after her roast dinner. Honestly never mind blue blood the whole air is blue when she's playing football, filthy language.

[LeonBrooke]

:erm: How do you know these things? Are you a stalker??

I should call the police on you!

(yeah, that's another person removed from my path to the LW...)

[MrJan]

Calling the police will do no good. Most of the lads from Scotland Yard join in with the kick about, they play Wembley (WEMBERLY, WEMBERLY) and 'headers and volleys' all the time. I've seened it with my own two eyes, honest :erm:

[stevie_gerrard]

Did someone mention football? :p :

[MrJan]

I don't think so? :confused: Unless I might possibly, ever so slightly, maybe have quietly mentioned or let slip that Exeter City are goin to Wembley. Which is more than can be said for all but around 9 other clubs this season. WEMBERLY, WEMBERLY, WEMBERLY, WEMBERLY (As you may have realised the whole 'Exeter City playing at Wembley' thing has got me a tad excited.

[LeonBrooke]

I think we should talk about something else.

[Rollo]

I was talking a load of bollocks in the Chit Chat section :D

[LeonBrooke]

Okay, let's talk about reproduction.

Does anyone know the way a baby descends through the birth canal during birth? Does anyone know the stages of labour?

[CarlMetro]

Erm............

[LeonBrooke]

That's a no? All right, let's not talk about delivery.

How about spaceships?

[CarlMetro]

What? Babies come on spaceships?

[LeonBrooke]

Do they? So they lied to me at university... I always thought so, but I didn't realise the magnitude of it! I call for revolution!

[Rollo]

I call for revolution!
Number nine, Number nine, Number nine, Number nine, Number nine, Number nine, Number nine, Number nine, Number nine, Number nine, Number nine, Number nine, Number nine... etc :D

[djarumdudley]

What? Babies come on spaceships?

does this mean, when aboard a spaceship babies could be self-reproductive?!

[LeonBrooke]

If you really want to help, Rollo, why don't you come to my place, and you, me and the LW can clean my house :D

Dudley and Carl can come too and the six of us can have a cleaning party, and discuss babies and space ships.

[Rollo]

I aint discussing babies with anyone. My girlfriend asks me if I want to have children after we're married and I say sure...

... but they're better with barbeque sauce :D

[LeonBrooke]

Okay, we don't have to discuss babies, but when can I expect you for the cleaning party?

[Rollo]

Seeing as though it's a public holiday, how does Wednesday 25th April, 2007 sound?

[LeonBrooke]

That would be great! If we can get all the work done in the past, I won't have to be asphyxiating myself in the present :D

[djarumdudley]

that'll be fine, seeing as in the fiture the last word would still remain with me.

[Donney]

But the LW is mine and won't available during the weekend. It will come with me to enjoy some racing live action.

[LeonBrooke]

I was sure it was here with me, gagging from the chlorine in the air.

[CarlMetro]

Well you keep gagging, I'll rescue the LW and give it mouth to mouth.

[Donney]

Someone stop that man he is a perv of some kind!
:s hock:

;)

[LeonBrooke]

I'll provide refuge for the LW!

[Donney]

Just stop Carl, thanks.

[LeonBrooke]

I'll call the police on him and take the LW in, really, it's no trouble.

[Donney]

But I would not like to bother you, I'll have the LW and you can deal with the Law Forces.

[CarlMetro]

"This is the Forum Police.................release the LW and lay down on the floor with you hands behind your head"

[Donney]

Never! I'm ready to fight your ninjas!!!!

http://www.freesmileys.org/emo/rpg015.gif (http://www.freesmileys.org)

[Captain VXR]

So you are, I am taking the lw to see the stand off :D

[CarlMetro]

I'm not fighting, I'm just taking :D

[schmenke]

... and giving... to me :D

[CarlMetro]

Erm.......................no :confused:

[schmenke]

Well, then you leave me no choice but to...

Hey look over there! What's that?!

(...yoink!...)

[Donney]

Such an old trick....

[CarlMetro]

............from an old bloke ;)

[schmenke]

Yeah, but it worked! :D :p :

[Donney]

or did it?

[LeonBrooke]

Apparently so, because when the LW came to my sparklingly-clean house it told me it had just come from schmenke's.

[schmenke]

...and it yearns to return...

[stevie_gerrard]

....to me :p :

[LeonBrooke]

By "me", I assume you mean me :p :

[Rollo]

That would be great! If we can get all the work done in the past, I won't have to be asphyxiating myself in the present :D

Yes but you see, as previously discussed before, I am a time traveller.

I went back in time, found that your house was a mess and just assumed that you liked it that way. The laws of causality meant that if I did anything rash, then the present would be different...
... so that's why I flushed your toilets and switched on Shortland St.

Of course if you don't remember this then it's probably now a zero-weight time dialation of which the space-time continuum has self repaired.

[Rollo]

Am I talking to myself?

Is this a case of third-regeneration exact parallel opposition? If it is then it's extremely rare.


Am I talking to myself?

Is this a case of third-regeneration exact parallel opposition? If it is then it's extremely rare.

Yes, and you're even quoting yourself in the exact same post that it came from. I think you may have stumbled on a critical date time hole, rather like November 12, 1955, the date of the invention of the magnetic flux-capacitor.

[LeonBrooke]

Now this looks serious. I think the solution is to come here, watch some more Shortland Street and wait for the show to rot your brain. That way you'll stop noticing all of this weird stuff :up:

[Rollo]

That wouldn't help much as I'm a time traveller.

I also keep on bumping into these chaps who all claim to be medical practitioners, but if they are, they all operate out of ill-placed blue phone box things - they can't be very good at it. I would suspect that they got their degrees at Karachi of something.

[LeonBrooke]

Who knows? These days anyone can be a doctor - the standards are slipping. I should know: I hang around with medical students sometimes :p :

[djarumdudley]

too bad the last word doesn't enjoy the company of those students.

[LeonBrooke]

It doesn't like med students but it likes nursing students :D

[CarlMetro]

Not all of them :p :

[Donney]

But the LW enjoys the European Hill-Climb championship, so tomorrow will be travelling with me (in space not in time) to enjoys the pleasures of fast cars and loud engines.

[CarlMetro]

Sounds like fun, but the LW never told me we were going, do you think you've spoiled the surprise now?

[Donney]

Oh no we've already made plans, you were not included I think but I'll discuss it with the LW itself.

[CarlMetro]

But how can that be? The LW is with me this weekend.

[schmenke]

No it's not. It's a clone.
The real LW is with me.

[Captain VXR]

CLONES for all of you, mine is the real one

[CarlMetro]

Time for a bit of yoinking :D

[schmenke]

You'll go blind if you keep doing that.

[Captain VXR]

I don't mind going blind, YOINK!!!

[CarlMetro]

Then you won't see me sneek in and steal the LW then :D

[stevie_gerrard]

well i did im afraid :p :

[Captain VXR]

My lw safety goons have no respect for footballers, and gave me the lw back while giving the perputrater ten knuckle sandwhiches

[CarlMetro]

A nice little pre-qualifying yoink for me :D

[djarumdudley]

that's enough for you.

[Captain VXR]

And you

[stevie_gerrard]

i shall take over, obviously none of you can be trusted with this sacred thing :p :

[djarumdudley]

thanks for keeping it warm.

[LeonBrooke]

... for me :D

[Captain VXR]

The last word is with me now, and says that Leon is it's second favourite master, after me :D

[MrJan]

boo!

[CarlMetro]

Hoo!

[Captain VXR]

Go sulk then Miguel and Carl, just cos I got the lw :p

[Mp3 Astra]

Reminds me of me

[stevie_gerrard]

does it now?

[Mp3 Astra]

It does now

[LeonBrooke]

But I have the LW now, not you.

[CarlMetro]

No you don't!

[LeonBrooke]

You are a meanie...

[CarlMetro]

Who? Me? :angel:

[LeonBrooke]

Yes, you.

[djarumdudley]

are without the last word.

[DonnieDarco]

Yes you are Dudley :D

[djarumdudley]

no i'm not!

[LeonBrooke]

Donnie's right - you are without the last word :D

[CarlMetro]

.......because it's decided it likes to spend most of it's time with me :D

[Donney]

I see all this debate pointless as the LW spent the weekened with me and it is here by my side remembering the great memories of fast, noisy, gasoline smelling cars thundering through treacherous mountain bends.

We particularly enjoyed a Jaguar D Type, a Lancia 037 and three Ferraris.

:D

[CarlMetro]

It sounds like you had a nice time :up: Just a shame you're still trying to convince yourself, and us, that the LW was with you :\

[Donney]

Oh yes we did have a great time together :D

And we are watching some of the pics.

[CarlMetro]

You might be, the LW is enjoying some fresh coffee with me :)

[Donney]

That's about enough coffee don't you agree????

[CarlMetro]

Probably, but I've just brought a couple of cinamon danish now, and I won't be able to eat them both :lips:

[schmenke]

The LW doesn't like cinnamon, so I'll have that second one thanks :D

[Donney]

I thought you had a wife and a kid, I'm sure they'd love a piece of that danish.

[schmenke]

Kids ;) :D

They also enjoy the company of the LW :D

[CarlMetro]

Which is why I must have it back, mine are due home anytime now :D

[Captain VXR]

But I am selfish to kids :evil: so I gallantly gallop on a horse and pluck the last word from peasant Carl's hands

[CarlMetro]

You could try, I'd simply tell you to pluck off :p :

[MrJan]

pluck plucck pluck, pluck plucking pluck

[djarumdudley]

the last word has no time for blathering drivel.