go farting

[donKey jote]

hi lads im really into go farting and would like to start doing some compitions around the UK dose anyone no how i would go about doing that and have any phone numbers i could ring etc. thanks

All About Farts (http://www.davidstuff.com/humor/farts.htm)

58H1Icqw-3Y

[Rollo]

I've read that the average person farts about 15 times a day and produces something like 500mL of gas all up. I would assume that most of it is produced by gut flora in the act of digestion. Am I right?

[Eki]

Did you know that fart means speed in Swedish? That cow was probably caught by a fartkamera:

fartkamera - Wiktionary (http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/fartkamera)

Swedish

[edit]Noun
fartkamera c
traffic camera, a still camera to monitor speeding on highways

[555-04Q2]

ioan will like this thread :p :

[EuroTroll]

How much money do you have, Donks? ;)

It might be best to begin with co-farting for another farter. Many championship-winning farters have actually begun their careers as co-farters, as have many rally co-drivers.

[Eki]

I was once listening to a football match and was amused to hear there was a player named Fan Der Fart. I wonder if he has a brother named Enthusiast Der Fart.

[SGWilko]

My mate Mick (the master farter) has a double jointed arse........

[Rollo]

My mate Mick (the master farter) has a double jointed arse........

Would it be wind protected and fuel-injected by any chance?

[SGWilko]

Would it be wind protected and fuel-injected by any chance?

That's the one - burns the nose, stings the eyes and even scorches the grass...


Does Micks' double jointed arse............

[F1boat]

I was once listening to a football match and was amused to hear there was a player named Fan Der Fart. I wonder if he has a brother named Enthusiast Der Fart.

Hahhhaahhahha!

[555-04Q2]

I was once listening to a football match and was amused to hear there was a player named Fan Der Fart. I wonder if he has a brother named Enthusiast Der Fart.

I think you mean Van der Fard?

[Knock-on]

A Mildly Amusing Slide Show (Ive Parted Ivor Biggun) - YouTube (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kY-10i_nEXU)

[Eki]

I think you mean Van der Fard?
Actually I think it's written Van der Vaart.

Rafael van der Vaart - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rafael_van_der_Vaart)

[schmenke]

My mate Mick (the master farter) has a double jointed arse........

How does he manage to stay on a bar stool?

[Eki]

How does he manage to stay on a bar stool?
Upward propulsion.

[Eki]

Do cows at wind farms fart more or louder than cows at other farms?

[ioan]

ioan will like this thread :p :

Impossible, henners already likes it... ;)

[SGWilko]

How does he manage to stay on a bar stool?

He turns it upside down - prevents the wind too until the pressure reaches 5.0Bar that is.......

[janneppi]

I was once listening to a football match and was amused to hear there was a player named Fan Der Fart. I wonder if he has a brother named Enthusiast Der Fart.
I used to snicker when Robin Van persie and Rafael van der Vaart passed the ball to each other. persie (perse=ass in finnish)

[schmenke]

Sorry, perhaps a bit off topic...

There's a land area just at the edge of our city, that's currently under review for commercial and residential development, called Paskapoo.
I'm not sure where the name comes from; I believe it's some native indian term.

I certainly wouldn't want to be the contractor that has to cut down those trees... :mark:

[race aficionado]

Fart Farms

[EuroTroll]

There's a land area just at the edge of our city, that's currently under review for commercial and residential development, called Paskapoo.
I'm not sure where the name comes from; I believe it's some native indian term.

Sounds like a promising development; especially for people of Finnish descent. :)

[Eki]

Fart Farms
I wouldn't want one of those in my backyard.

[race aficionado]

I wouldn't want one of those in my backyard.

It's the noise . . . and of course the smell . . . but they are "green".

[SGWilko]

Fart Farms

Isn't that owned by the same people who ran Rapture farms? ;)

[Eki]

Sounds like a promising development; especially for people of Finnish descent. :)

I can't believe Estonians made this:

TMDQPCeJ_GI&feature=related

out of this:

jAyXzC7iKPA&feature=fvwrel

[Eki]

Actually this sounds more right:

V2nFW6segGs&feature=fvwrel

[donKey jote]

it all sounds a bit fishy to me :\

[EuroTroll]

I suspect Eki has cast me as the fish in his "Eki and the Fish" spectacle... :)

Good crap, though. :D

[donKey jote]

Eki could really use you right now ? :eek: :s ailor: :crazy: :kiss: :p

[EuroTroll]

1Uvt83YWWWY

[donKey jote]

I know which one eki is, but which is you ? :p

[EuroTroll]

The tall attractive one. :p :

[donKey jote]

you're a bloke? :eek: :p

[donKey jote]

Anyway, I have to say: damn you Eki and Studiose... now I have a stoopid earworm and I haven't a clue what any of the versions mean :mad:

Fun to see how the stoopid words are pronounced/written though :)

[EuroTroll]

Yes, a Finno-Ugric conspiracy. ;) Privy not to Indo-Europeans, even to ones as proficient in languages as you are, dear Donks. :)

[Eki]

you're a bloke? :eek: :p

You're an elephant?

[donKey jote]

Eki & his Eesti friend:
T8XeDvKqI4E

[Eki]

Anyway, I have to say: damn you Eki and Studiose... now I have a stoopid earworm and I haven't a clue what any of the versions mean :mad:

Fun to see how the stoopid words are pronounced/written though :)

Well, you take the original Finnish Lyrics here:

Poju - Poika (Saunoo) Lyrics (http://artists.letssingit.com/poju-lyrics-poika-saunoo-6dnswwp)

Put them through Google translate, and you get:

Son (goes to sauna) Lyrics.

Now the boy goes to sauna
it is bathed, it is to sing and shout
encouragement of champagne
Our son has come home
Now the boy goes to sauna
It monitors the riekkuu and Tidings
gaze mällää
Our son has come home
---
Rests in the autumn, it will draw people
own thinking about the past summer
Was ystävii, just metal runway
Now is cooped up in the gentlemen showcases
Before Christmas, unveils the eyes
is yet uncertain, new home
A few months need to skarpata
until it has become a time to celebrate
---
Now the boy goes to sauna
it is bathed, it is to sing and shout
encouragement of champagne
Our son has come home
Now the boy goes to sauna
It monitors the riekkuu and Tidings
gaze mällää
Our son has come home
---
When spring comes, it starts to heat
starts to watch the end of TIIMA
# PROG # yet, the trials of real-
hyperlevoton, do not fall asleep runway
changes to the annual Friends, faces
point the boy, they will embrace
Now the captain of hands, raise the
hugs kisses as her own child
---
Now the boy goes to sauna
it is bathed, it is to sing and shout
encouragement of champagne
Our son has come home
Now the boy goes to sauna
It monitors the riekkuu and Tidings
gaze mällää
Our son has come home

(repeat)
---
It has become home to
It has become home to
The boy has come home
It has become home to
Not enough time wars
The boy has come home!
---
Now the boy goes to sauna
it is bathed, it is to sing and shout
encouragement of champagne
Our son has come home
Now the boy goes to sauna
It monitors the riekkuu and Tidings
gaze mällää
Our son has come home

(repeat)