Interview the Person Above

[anfield5]

Where do you find the best Thai lady-boys, when you are not in Thailand?

Built for comfort not for speed, and certainly not for endurance!

[schmenke]

What did Billy's Missus think of your bed?

It was far easier to remove than I had thought.

[555-04Q2]

How did clearing the snow off you cars go on Monday?

Two ice cubes, a bottle of gin and a set of false teeth.

[schmenke]

What did Billy’s missus bring along on your date?

I forced it but it broke.

[555-04Q2]

Did you win with that stuck wheel nut?

Bring it on!

[steveaki13]

What did you say to the crane operator before your date with Billys Missus?

Sat in the back seat and watched. With popcorn of course

[schmenke]

What did you do during the date with 555 and Billy's missus?


It was quite gross but I couldn't help myself from watching.

[steveaki13]

What did you do when 555 was cutting his toe nails?

Schmenke

[555-04Q2]

Who was the last person you did the funky monkey with?

Steve.

[anfield5]

What is the real identity of Billy's Missus?

Sorry I didn't realise

[schmenke]

Why do you keep ringing Billy's missus when she's with 555 all this week?

I was sore the next day.

[anfield5]

How did you feel after your basic maths test?

Better of with an old copy of Popular Science really

[D-Type]

Do you think Steve's private life should remain private?

Anfield5

[anfield5]

Ermmmm.. Who claims to be 6 foot 5 inches tall with dark blonde hair, blue grey eyes, can run the 100m in 10 seconds, has an I.Q. of 154.... but is all likeyhood simply a freeking liar?

Duncan Rollo

[schmenke]

Who did Billy's missus say is her favourite date?


It was way overloaded.

[anfield5]

why did Billy's missus' thai lady-boys bed collapse last time schmenke visited?

it's the basic monetary unit of Outer Mongolia

[schmenke]

What are you doing with all those chicken bones in your pocket?

It'll take a considerable effort.

[D-Type]

Are you going to ask Billy's missus for a date?

Liquorice and mint

[steveaki13]

What flavour is you favourite sandwich spread?

Rhubarb and carrot

[anfield5]

What is you favourite pie filling?

Roast beef and custard

[D-Type]

What food combination would you give to someone you don't want to call again?

Beetroot and caviar

[anfield5]

What is that disgusting looking face pack you have on made from?

Roast Armadillo and boiled cabbage

[D-Type]

What do you want for dinner?

A boa constrictor ate it.

[schmenke]

What happened to your beetroot and caviar?


It's just pocket change.

[steveaki13]

Is this wad of 103,302,203 dollars yours?

£1.28p

[anfield5]

What would you like as a reward for returning my $103302203 ?

Stingy bastard!

[D-Type]

What will be the nickname of the next Scottish first minister?

Fence sitter

[anfield5]

What do you call someone sitting on a fence?

a polyglot

[schmenke]

What do you call someone with many glots?


They're very bouncy.

[steveaki13]

What do you think of these?

Square with holes full of cheese.

[anfield5]

Describe the perfect wheels for your new car.

They work better at high speed

[D-Type]

How are your wellies for sheep chasing?

Made in Australia

[anfield5]

Where does D-Types obvious sheep fixation come from?

Mint sauce, crispy roast potatoes and a good red wine

[steveaki13]

How do you like your Sheep?

Wired for Sound

[D-Type]

What's the last thing you expect your dinner to be?

They don't like it

[anfield5]

Why should you never wire a sheep for sound?

Baaaaaaaaaaaaastaaaaard

[D-Type]

What did the News of the World record when they wired the Rugby player's room?

Sheep and being good at Rugby

[anfield5]

Apart from the being good at rugby bit, what is Wales famous for?

Wooly Mammoth

[D-Type]

What does a NZ forward want to meet at a party?

Indian elephants

[anfield5]

What left foot marks in the butter in an Indian fridge?

3 and 7/8 feet

[555-04Q2]

How long is your left foot?

If you insist, ok!

[anfield5]

Will you measure your left foot?

It erm... kinda.... well.... it just fell off!

[steveaki13]

What happened to you Left Foot?

Your legs are so swollen.

[D-Type]

Why shouldn't I wear a kilt

There was nothing underneath

[anfield5]

When you look at the FIFA ranking, what was there written below San Marino?

Two steam trains, a penny-farthing and a sailing ship with 4 masts.

[schmenke]

What are your most memorable Christmas presents?

I lost it in the back seat of a Ford Escort.

[steveaki13]

What happened to your mind, when going on a date with Billy's missus?

As rare as hens teeth.

[anfield5]

How common are hens teeth?

When I pulled up my fishing net it was just sitting there, tangled up in seaweed

[schmenke]

How did you end up finding your left foot?

It was a snug fit, but I made do.

[anfield5]

How was the back seat of the Escort with Billy's missus and my left foot?

I didn't know that that was what I was supposed to do with it, so I ate it instead

[D-Type]

What did you do to Billy's missus?

Left-handed, left-footed and left on the shelf.

[anfield5]

Can you describe D-Type's weekend when the wife is away?

He would be quite happy with a glass of warm-flat beer and a grease-ridden burger!

[schmenke]

What would D-Type prefer to an evening with Billy's missus?


I forced it until it eventually broke.

[D-Type]

How did you open the door of Billy's missus's car?

Getting out - not getting in - IDIOT!

[anfield5]

What was Duncan doing in Billy's missus' bed room?

20 litres of white paint, 2 brushes, a pot of glue and some rice.

[schmenke]

What did you use to construct your new house?

It keeps falling apart.

[anfield5]

What's wrong with using 20 litres of white paint, 2 brushes, a pot of glue and some rice. To build your new house with?

We're going to need a bigger boat!

[schmenke]

What was your reaction when Billy's missus mentioned that she wanted to go fishing with you?

It wasn't nearly sufficient to handle it.

[anfield5]

Why did you fishing rod break when you were trawling Billy's Missus behind the boat to attract sharks?

All it took was one quick look, and it ran away screaming like a wounded banshee.

[D-Type]

How did you get rid of the alligator?

Anything except Billy's Missus please!

[schmenke]

What do you want to discuss next?

A box of crayons.

[anfield5]

What do you intend to give your wife for Christmas?

She just slapped me for no reason at all!

[schmenke]

What happened when you told Billy's missus that you'd need a bigger boat?

A tennis ball cut in half.

[anfield5]

If you play cricket, and can't find a box, what is something you should never wear in its' place (for those who don't know what a cricket box is, it is a high impact plastic shield, worn to protect your family jewels)

I had some but they were destroyed when I didn't have a box!

[Crash82]

Do you have any tennis balls cut in half I could borrow to play cricket with?

I do, I always keep one in the car, just in case!

[anfield5]

Do you have any tennis balls cut in half I could borrow to play cricket with?

I do, I always keep one in the car, just in case!

Welcome newbie :)

[anfield5]

Do you have a spare blow-up doll?

They are a wee bit bitter at first, but over time you gradually don't notice, and eventually you don't miss the real ones at all.

[D-Type]

Do you like Lidl chocolates?

Liquorice allsorts and fudge

[anfield5]

What do Pirelli use to make F1 racing tyres?

He did, she didn't - how we all laughed and laughed

[schmenke]

Did D-Type and Billy's missus enjoy your recent pajama party?

It was a lot of fun until the batteries died.

[anfield5]

Did D-Type and Billy's missus enjoy YOUR recent pajama party?

It made a sound like the mating call of a hippo, than eventually faded into a soft whistling noise

[schmenke]

How did it sound when Billy's missus farted?


It took at least a dozen tries before I managed.

[anfield5]

Can you write your own name?

supercalifragilisticexpialidocious

[steveaki13]

What's your favourite song of all time?

Blondie.

[anfield5]

What was Barak Obama's nick name as a child?

just whistle!!

[anfield5]

What's your favourite song of all time?

Blondie.

Holey thread resurrection Batman!

[steveaki13]

What did George Bush say was the key to winning wars?

I have no idea what the question was.

[anfield5]

What was the question?

Just multiply it by your age, then subtract your IQ